Day 153


No blanket photo today. I’m not sure what I was thinking when I created the plan to have a triangle worked in this direction but it needs a new pattern and I can’t think it through tonight.

I had a good day at knitting including selling the green and pink shawl I’ve been knitting. Got some food shopping done, bought some awesome new false nails and pink hair dye, and had a surprise visit from friends after dinner. But my neck and upper back won’t relax and I’ve had a headache developing for the last three days. It’s not very strong but it’s persistent and distracting. There will be graphing and calculating tomorrow to make it work

Oh! And I got the motor details wrong the other day. We’re looking to get a brushless motor for the e-spinner, which I think is going to need yet another reworking of the housing. It will be worth it. And we still haven’t spent half of the cost of a commercially made one.

Heard an old favourite while shopping today and I fancy something uplifting tonight. I really enjoy singing along to Des’ree. India Arie is very similar I think. Uncomplicated music with positive, melodic vocals. This song in particular was a positive for me during my teens when I felt most isolated from my peer group and alien in the world around me. It’s about the same time that I decided I was who I am and that I wasn’t going to change. But more than that, I refused to be told that who I was and how I felt was wrong. It’s not that simple in the moment to moment but it’s a desire, and a determination at my core. And when it comes to my precarious grip on my mental health, this is desperately important. It’s hard enough working through that mental mine field without also having to negotiate the lies we tell ourselves.

Anyway, Des’ree – You Gotta Be